Friday, September 24, 2010

Look, Listen and Learn

Mr decided to invite my MIL (Mama Kat), FIL, Aunt Del and Uncle over for dinner last Saturday. They had yet to see the new place and we wanted to welcome them into our new habitat. Of course the women and men soon became separated as the men flocked in front of the TV watching football and we the women headed to the back room where we just chatted, well… they chatted and I listened. Aunt Del has been married for 45 years and my MIL just celebrated her 30 year anniversary. As they began talking about marriage and their husbands I tried to absorb as much information as possible. I even had a moment where I smiled and said this is really nice. I pray that Mr. and I can someday too celebrate our 30th and 45th anniversary. I laid on my bed and listened to the sounds of what today is history. To them it probably was just a time catching up and chatting like they normally do, but to me it was seeing the legacy of where my husband came from. Watching and listening to the women talk about life, love and men gave me so much clarity. It really cleansed my pallet. Since my grandmother passed a little over a year ago, I haven’t had those moments. Those moments where I can just listen to the wisdom and take in everything that they have to say that will help me grow and learn. I hardly said anything but they made sure to make me feel included by rubbing my back or playing in my hair as they talked and I laid on the bed.

After they left Mr. said WOW, I learned so much about marriage today. And it wasn't because the men were in front of the tube discussing relationships, it was as if he was doing the same thing as me. Listening and absorbing sound information, gestures and communication skills that helped build the longevity that both my FIL and Uncle have achieved within their marriage. He told me the things that he learned that day but I kept the things that I learned to myself because truth be told it was girl talk. There were some things that I heard before such as choose your battles, and don’t sweat the small stuff, keep busy and many more. But hearing it from Momma Kat and Aunt Del was a different experience for me. Sitting back and watching how these two women who raised my husband interact and nurture him gave me an Aah Haa moment. Everything made sense to me in regards to how my husband responds to certain situations and it really helps us to be more in tune with each other.

I am truly blessed to have in-laws that accept me as one of their own or at least make me feel that way. It really helps keep the marriage sound when you have people that you both care for and love on your side. Supporting you and showing you what real love and marriage is about. Marriage just like anything has its ups and downs, hi’s and lows but I am grateful that we both have a support system that we can go to during those difficult times. Right now our marriage is still in its infancy, developing and still blossoming and every obstacle or hurtle that we have faced has made us stronger and that much more in love, but over time I am sure we will probably need to use a few of those life lines.

Mr.

Meeeee

15 comments:

  1. It sounds like you have a fabulous relationship with your in-laws =) good for you hun!
    Something previously known always sounds more profound when coming from people you respect (i.e.: parents/in-laws, etc) I think =)

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  2. Awww.....how sweet......makes me wanna gag!!!! LOL Love you! They do share wisdom & they both are true testaments to that because Daddy & Uncle Johnny are some crazy men!!!

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  3. That's so sweet! I love my in-laws too! It's a very special situation to be in....we are lucky ladies!!!

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  4. AHHH, color me jealous, lol. I wish wish wish that I had long-time married women available to me to gain this wisdom from! It's awesome to be able to learn from women who are where you want to be, and can help to show you the way to get there!

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  5. What a blessing! I have been married for 5 years and the first 2 were so shaky. My husband grew up without a father or a father figure only hardworking single mothers. He had no idea what a male's role was in marriage. It took some time and had we not been able to fall back on our friendship when times got tough I hate to say we might not have made it....But we did and all is well! I honestly think if he would've had the examples set for him that your hubby did we may have been able to skate over those obstacles, but its those same obstacles that make us stronger!! Feel blessed, you are a lucky girl!

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  6. Titus 2 in action
    You are fortunate to have great in laws. Also Very cute baby pictures of you two....now tell me did you keep all those bows on? :)

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  7. What a great post! So often in our world people get married with the mind set of "well, if this doesn't work out we can always get a divorce" and I think that is so sad. My mom and dad just celebrated their 40th anniversary this past weekend, and I am so thankful to have such amazing role models to form my own marriage after!

    Thank you for sharing your blessings!
    Following you back : )

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  8. Have a wonderful weekend! Hope you will come visit and follow me too! http://www.trying2staycalm.com/

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  9. You are a lovely blog and I am giving you an award. Come to my blog to get it.

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  10. It is so nice to have a good relationship with your in-laws. I am so bless to have a great in-laws lije yours.

    Thanks for your comments, I really appreciate it.

    Have a great Sunday.

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  11. Love it, and what a blessing! That is wonderful that you are able to have that relationship with your in-laws and can look to them for advice.

    You and hubby were so adorable as kids!

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  12. I have a great relationship with my in-laws and my husband loves my family. It makes things so nice!

    I love the pictures!!

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  13. That's awesome. Having great in-laws is definitely a blessing. There is nothing like unconditional love.

    Your blog is excellent!

    May God bless you, hubby, and your marriage until the end of time.

    Looking forward to more of your posts. ;)

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  14. Great post! It's truly a blessing to have great in-laws. Can't wait to read more. Have a blessed day.

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