Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Misconception of Conception

I honestly never thought conception would be such a wearisome task for me. I come from a very large Extremely large family and procreation seemingly wasn’t a problem. In fact, the theory in our lineage was if someone was pregnant; expect two more babies to follow as we come in three’s. So imagine my anguish when I miscarried not once but three times (2 miscarriages and 1 ectopic). The first one took place while I was living in New York, the Mr. in Atlanta and way before the nuptials. Yes, of course I wanted the "first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in the baby carriage", but it didn't happen that way. Nevertheless, I was so elated to know that I was bringing life into this world. Well that was short lived due to a late term miscarriage at 15 1/2 weeks. I was in utter shock, disbelief and hurt to the core but Mr. remained strong  for both of us throughout that traumatic ordeal. The love and support from him really helped bring me out of my funk.

Me in ATL happy and 14 weeks pregnant
The second miscarriage happened really fast. I found out I was pregnant in October of 2009 and before the month was up, I was in the emergency room with yet another nurse informing me that I had miscarried. The thrill was gone before I even got on the ride. I grieved a little but got busy and continued on my journey. I found out I was pregnant again on New Year’s Eve 2010 (Fertile Myrtle..I know). What a fabulous way to bring in the New Year by celebrating life. My hormone levels were normal and doubling like they were supposed to; I was so overjoyed. I filled my DVR with episodes of Special Deliveries, A Baby Story, Birthday and all other pregnancy related shows. Not to mention the books and pregnancy journals I purchased. I just knew this time would be different. I knew this one would make it outside of the womb and call me Mommy. Well our celebration was short lived because a few days later, I had severe pain on my right side. On a scale of 1-10 the pain was about an 8. It was at that moment I knew something was wrong. I went to the ER and found out the baby was in my right tube. He or She never completed their journey. I was so heartbroken and in complete denial until the pain came back and forced me to believe what the doctor’s were telling me. After two weeks and two failed methotrexate injections (Medication to dissolve the pregnancy), the baby continued to grow rapidly in my tube. My doctor had no choice but to perform surgery to remove the pregnancy. Thankfully my tube did not have to be removed. The surgery went well and I recovered physically in a few days.

Out of all of the pregnancies the ectopic was by far the worst. It was the fear of the unknown and the possibility of losing my fertility for good.

About a month ago I was giving a clean bill of health from my doctor. Everything is in place and working the way it should. We will start trying for a mini B & B really soon.

My perception about conception was all wrong. Based on the number of pregnant teens in my high school I just thought, you have sex, you get pregnant, you have a baby....point blank.


While researching an educating myself on possible conditions I came across some alarming facts:

  • 6.2 million women between the ages of 15 and 44 are diagnosed as being infertile;
  • 40% of infertility is caused by female factor, 40% is caused by male factor, and 20% is caused by a joint male and female factor; and
  • Only one third of women of African descent who face this issue seek treatment.
So we haven’t giving up or even allowed the past mishaps to consume our lives.
I found this quote on The Broken Brown Egg Foundation Facebook fan page (A foundation whose goal is to encourage African Americans to talk about this topic so that those dealing with fertility concerns and reproductive health issues won't feel so alone, through humor, activism, and hope):
"To make a great omelet, you have to be willing to break a few eggs."
So simple but so true.

Ok, publish....I'm so happy I shared this.

Friday, July 23, 2010

As Promised Arden B Giveaway!!!

Arden B is one of my all time favorite stores! They are very economical and you can always find the latest fashions and trends.  If you refer to my previous post, Pause...For Me Time; I posted pictures of several cute little dresses and accessories that I purchased to build up my summer wardrobe.  With the help of the Mr., Sassy Wife is hosting its first giveaway to celebrate the Launch of Sassy Mahogany Wife Blog! 2 and I repeat 2 Lucky winners will receive a $75 gift card to Arden B....  Will it be you?

To Enter:
  • Visit Sassy Wife's Facebook Page and click on the "like" button ~ 1 Entry
  • Follow me on Google Connect ~ 1 Entry
  • Tweet or re-tweet this post @SassyWife ~ 1 Entry
  • Sign up your e-mail to receive updates ~1 Entry
  • Share this post with your Facebook friends ~ 1 Entry
  • Blog about this giveaway and link back to Sassy Wife ~ 1 Entry
  • Leave a comment on any posts I make this month either on Facebook or my blog ~ 1 Entry
  • 2 eligible entries will be randomly chosen as the winner. (
  • The deadline for entries is August 16, 2010
  • Leave each "Extra Entry" in a separate comment or it will not count
  • Valid for US addresses only
  • You Must Be 18 years and older to enter
Good Luck

 *Disclaimer: This giveaway is sponsored by Sassy Mahogany Wife and Family not Arden B

You Saved Me

WOW!!!! That is all I have to say about date night last night. The Mr. and I went to the one night only screening of "You Saved Me" brought to us by Lamar and Ronnie Tyler of Black and Married With Kids. What an excellent documentary of real relationships in the black community. I was so proud of my Real Wives of Chicago Sisters, we showed up and showed out with our husbands.

Some of my RWOC sisters with hubby's at the screening
I love the message that the Tyler's are spreading. It is so amazing to see that black love and marriage still exist in the community, amidst  the many negative factors that are attacking the black family.

I just love...LOVE.

Check out the trailor....

If you missed it dont fret, the DVD is available for purchase, just click the link below. 

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Pause...For Me Time!

Moving is such an overwhelming task! The Mr. and I are somewhat settled, although we still have a few more items to find a home for before we are completely organized and back to norm. In the midst of the move and the blog launch, I was able to pause for a brief second (pause....) and get some shopping done for myself; via the internet. Oh how I heart the virtual world. Everything is literally at my finger tips. So I did a little online shopping and purchased a few summer dresses. I am still on the prowl for a few more, but I couldn’t pass up this sale at Arden B. If you notice most of my dresses or attire has a distinct style to it. Over the years I've learned how to accentuate my assets and flaws to allow me to appear, well…flawless. I have full (Twins), nice shapely legs but I have a little derrière and a thick waist! So I try to find dresses that will enhance my lovely curves, synch in my thick waist and add a pair of pumps to show up my legs. Look at my fabulous finds. Yes, sassy yet classy.

Cinch in my waste and accentuate my girls..Haute! How Cute is this dress! Date night with the Hubby. Haute!

This is such a fun Maxi Dress. I think this will work perfect for walks on the Lake Front.

This is just super cute.

Make sure you stop back tommorow for Sassy Wife's first Giveaway!
A $75 gift card to Arden B !!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

I'll be right back...

Hi Folks,

Please bare with me as the Mr. and I recently moved into a swanky new love nest (pics coming soon). We are in the process of getting settled and my internet should be up and running this week. Right now we are waiting for At&t U-verse to get to our home and install!! In the mean time, I am picking up a strong signal from my neighbor...shhhhhhhhhhhh. I had to let you know what was going on. Please stay tuned for an exciting giveaway and more sassy blog talk.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

SMW Mentor Program

A great mentor is one who aims for others' abilities to surpass their own. Sassy Wife along with Mister's Wife(Nicole Spann) is launching a Sassy Mahogany Wives Foundation Mentor Program; turning our daughters dreams into a reality.

Complete details coming soon

Who is Sassy Wife

Welcome to my Sassy Wife world; my channel to voice my thoughts and opinions. A place to share my hopes and dreams; my very own medium used to recount my personal stories and to utter frustrations....

My name is Brandi and I simply adore being a woman. My favorite color is pink and I love all things fashion, especially pencil skirts and pumps. I am originally from Reading, PA but have been blessed to live in DE, NYC and now Chicago. With each city that I lived in I've gained a new sense of me in life and in fashion.

Sparks turned into fireworks on July 5th, 2009 when the Mr. and I entered into those sacred nuptials. I work in corporate America, enjoy event planning, crafting, creating custom invitations and baking, but my favorite role is being a wife to a man who makes my soul smile.

The Sassy Wife Chronicles will recount the highs and lows that I will face as a 30 something African American woman married to a police officer in Chicago. So whether I am home making, designing, baking, event planning or baby making you will read about it in this space.
Right now our nest is empty but hopefully soon we will be blessed with a mini B&B. Until then we are patiently waiting on the lord.

We waited on the Lord and he delivered! After three years of trying, 5 miscarriages and 1 ectopic pregnancy, we were blessed with a beautiful baby girl on July 11, 2012.  Her name is Brianna June and she brings us so much joy.

For questions about this blog please email brandi {at} sassymahoganywife {dot} com